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12 August 2000
        Well this is cyberspace where time is essential to surfers with such gathering of information only a click away, well let me say I'm enjoying this foolhardy notion that anyone is listening...still - but if you are, good grief Linus...write me!
        Carla DeMarco's interview with me was written 18 months before I went cyberspace. Since then the walls have been painted and insulated, a few holes filled, the living room ceiling was bared to oak wood tongue-and-groove painted white. The piano was given to my 6 year old granddaughter Miriel. No, I didn't/don't plan on making money on the internet, it just costs less to publish here.
        I feel so much richer. David (Jake) Jackson has held my hand since I first found his poem "Fire" and asked to publish it in Moongate.
       Ken Peters extraordinare who poems, even from inside the soupbowl - is more prolific with his pen than seven Shake-a-spears (sorry Ken that just 'popped' out).
        I guess I'm trying to write some motherbird herstory...the bird who feels the early worm giggle yes...there is more to learn about predatory and predator. Yes we humans abuse one another with preditorship - it shoulda/coulda/woulda been fun if childhood taught fears had not stolen fun away...
        Yeah...I think we're having some fun yet...
        Ask Uncle River who lives in a Paradise - always physical, sometimes mental of which two / Hermit poems were inspired. Our friends will tell you, when I became a bull he became a bear, but now, with 20 years practice, I stopped breaking china and he stopped running into the woods.
        More anon. It is 3:49 a.m. I've been vurking since 1:00 and it is once again time to check Motherbird stats, a daily ritual for me now that motherbird has her own nest.

        Playing with myself again...but at this age it's always mental now. I at once have this desire to to write about who I have become in 66 years and the poopaa of 'for whom' as de Buddha once asked me "for whom do you write poetry" - so I have repeated this question to myself several times and the answer keeps evolving - at least it feels like evolution the subject always being love.

      "To live, a  bee, thus harms not, the pollen giver."

         All these beautiful people I've met thru publishing poetry - that share their inner self, so less threatening in cyberspace...ah so there is a way...
        Then there's Bylle Payton on death row in San Quentin who types reams of pages speaking such wisdom that comes from 20 years on death row never knowing when the next dearest friend will be executed....
        ...who, thru various appeals, both devastating and exhaulting, thru losing a wife, thru finding he had hepatitis C and thru the painful treatment when if finally came 10 years or so after the fact - his creative loving spirit survives. Yes he sometimes has bouts of depression that lasts several months but thus far he is still a survivor.
        He once told me one of his depression bouts came with a birthday that was quite near what he says is about the oldest one gets on death row - 52, he believes that inmates of death row either die of some disease or a broken heart or both long before the age of 52.

August 21

life is better than death
death is better than life
the "religious" would die to life with sacrifice expecting death to be better

September 4

"incomprehensible"

bear eyes mourning for a species
whose mating habits include
coloring their faces with
bile of bear

September 28

lordy email spam is growing
everyone wants an email list of their visitors
and so do advertisers and would be world wide controllers
will spam and porn take over and eventually destroy
cyberspace usefulness
mankind's greatest technological invention for free speech?

more anon